There is a very thin line between responsible and over responsible. It is necessary to be responsible, but things go wrong when you are over-responsible.
The habit of pleasing everyone makes us feel that we are responsible for everything even if we cannot control the situations.
The fact is people who take all the responsibility of every situation on their shoulders are “people pleasers” who suppress and repress themselves to prioritise others and to minimise or eliminate conflict, disappointment and loss.
Sometimes we do not realise that we are slowly becoming “people pleasers.” So here is a guide which can help you to know if you are a “people pleaser” or not.
You Want Others To Like You:-
People who want to please others spend a lot of time worrying about what if someone rejects them. These worries make them do certain actions to make others happy, so that they won’t get rejected.
If you also believe that you deserve the attention and affection of people, you might be a people pleaser as well.
Saying “No” To Someone Is Hard For You:-
You might think and worry that, if you say “no” that will break someone’s expectations and make you rude.
Agreeing on someone’s decision or saying “Yes” to everyone feels like a safe option to you. But this behaviour can cause problems because when you do everything for others and get nothing in return it breaks your heart which leads to anxiety.
So if you don’t say “no” and not prioritise yourself first that means you are one of the people pleasers.
You’re A Giver:-
Do you like giving as much as you can to others? People pleasers have the behaviour of giving. The therapist explained making sacrifices might feed your sense of self, but it can also lead you to a sense of martyrdom. You might give and give, and a hole that people will reciprocate with the affection and love you desire.
Low Self-Esteem:-
People pleasers often deal with low self-esteem and draw their certain image about themselves. They tend to seek validation in everything they do, you believe that people care about you.
So if you do find yourself doing any of the activities mentioned above, you might be a people pleaser.
